Life from my womb

My body; it is precious
more than a machine
It has co-created life
that will live, love and dream

the after effects are many
the cost was sometimes high
but beautifully arranged
and through it, I did fly

My belly bears the marks
that they grew inside me there
extra skin that sags
despite exercise and care

Stretch marks hiding down
beneath my pubic hair
and on my hips and thighs
flaws to find if I stare

But I see them as beauty
of the most sacred kind
and I will not regret
nor wish the past to rewind

My body once held more beauty
to the naked eye
to those who look without depth
over that, I used to cry

I now consider it a blessing
that my beauty lies so deep
and is tangled with my stretch marks
together peacefully, I sleep

And if you ever care to touch
and if you get to see
you can read the things I've learned
through the lines etched on my body

For what I gained and what I know
came through the map you'll trace
along the wrinkles and the scars
that transcend both time and space

I celebrate my age today
through life I have been brought
I wouldn't change my hair or skin
or the lessons that were wrought

I've paid for some mistakes
had mercy for many more
upon my back I've had burdens
that have knocked me to the floor

And I have cried a million tears
and wondered and hurt at it all
But I am still standing strong
no longer afraid to fall

I love my lived-in body
I finally see its worth
and thank God I am woman
and have participated in birth

Life has grown inside me
light inside my womb
I have housed the sacred
love in here has bloomed

And so I am now forty
and six children have been born
my body shows the signs
but I shall never mourn

The marks that are upon me
show my fragile humanity
my imperfections, strengths and gifts
combined, have created me...

Closed For Repairs

My heart is closed
closed for repairs
don't come near me
I wouldn't dare

My heart is closed
shut off from you
and the prior pain
I have been through

My heart is closed
it fades to black
color is dead
no light through the cracks

My heart is closed
and I don't trust
your sweet words
wrapped up in lust

My heart is closed
and I don't care
that you desire my body
with my skin so fair

My heart is closed
the door slammed shut
you cannot enter
to wound or cut

My heart is closed
and I feel relief
no more sorrow
no more grief

My heart is closed
and my body is too
I won't play
unless I love you

But my heart is closed
and so goodbye I say
I shed no tears
as I walk away...

Waiting...

I am waiting
to be
rejected
for my beliefs
Assuming
perhaps
erroneously
that my appeal
evaporated
with my boundaries
Still,
I am waiting
I am not pushing
or pulling
or insisting
merely
claiming my truth
and asking
then pausing
and waiting
for the whisper
that will answer me
in words
or silence
It is well
for me
to wait
I have stretched again
It is well
for me
to wait
and
I am beautifully
unencumbered
by fear
Who knew
waiting
could be
liberating?